UK -Politics & World Current Affairs

December 14, 2007

The Origins of the Art of Fiskrey©

. Some of you might ask, where did the young darling of British left J Hari, get his inspiration from? or who was his role-model in such art?
The independent, for about 21 years, became the experimental laboratory of a new art that would turn Merlin of Camelot green with envy, and it seems that the seed of such Art grew in that fertile soil of the left. Das Wunder Kind ‘Har’i, seems to manage his own genetically engineered hacks-qualities from seeds obtained from fruit the growth of which was enhanced by the art of fiskrey.
Because the term ‘ fiskrey’ and to fisk it - i.e. a news story has been fisked out- is now in frequent use in the business among hacks and hackettes , I thought I would place a definition of the term and fellow hacks are invited to add to it according to their own personal experience. 
The term fiskrey from the verb ‘to fisk’ something or to fisk an event was coined by Middle East specialists in the early 1990s, which roughly means the act of letting your imagination run like an unguided missile and produce wonderful prose that is opinion disguised as reporting.  ‘ To fisk it’ is a verb named after a famous writer who not only invented the method he perfected as an art no living journalist can even aspire to emulate, but he also possess some imagination that makes him the envy of  best fiction writers in history. 
To ‘fisk’ a story means to produce fiskrey either in part or in total, which is a mixture of making something up, being in two places hundreds of miles apart at the same time, and inventing ‘fighters’ and guerrilla (that no one else among the travelling press pack had the chance to see or meet) who would give you a quote so perfect to underpin the argument your fisked piece was designed to ram down the reader’s throat in the first place.
Fiskrey will also include exclusive interviews with terrorists in the dock during their high-security trial, which none of the other hundreds of journalists present in court managed to get since the high security trial meant they were kept away in the public gallery. such scoops- which they only know about from the editors back in London or read in the fisked paper after the trial was over- leaves them green with envy or seeing red and unable to control their anger at missing the gift of letting their imagination travel out of their body to report from far away land while they body remains in the same place with the rest of the travelling hacks.
One American reporter once suffered from such anti-fiskrey ethics attack (after a call from his editor blaming him for missing the fisked scoop that our famouse writer filled from inside Iranian border, despite not leaving hotel Shattelarab in Basra at all that day) that he beat up the famous darling-of-the left-writer after whom the term was invented, in Basra in 1980. 

Fiskrey as an art also includes people giving you secrete information no one else has ever obtained. Possessing this magic would make such info easily handed to you in a place no one has ever heard of or will ever hear of. It also include predictions of something that you have warned the world it would happened, and proven to be right although no one remembers you writing it at the time. .
The art of Fiskrey also includes some acts of self bravery like turning an argument over fare with a cabbie in Afghanistan into a political battle between Imperialist West and innocent East. Or opening your story with a paragraph suggesting you running into the fire of an explosion while every one else is running away from the scene without explaining how the police have allowed you to go thorough their lines as they stopped very other mortal from crossing into the scene of the incident?
Needless to say no one would ever find an Independent living soul to have witnessed your superman-like-action, which all part of the fog, magic and charm in which the art of fiskrey is shrouded.
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